Ok, so I’ve been a total fatass these past few weeks, and my birthday’s to blame. Here’s a brief list of the stuff I’ve had in the past week:

• Key lime pie
• Klondike bars
• Snickers cake
• Cookies (probably about two dozen, although I received three dozen)
• Cheesecake
• Confetti cake
• Pizza

So that’s one week’s worth of damage. To make matters worse, I haven’t even really had anybody over for my birthday, except for family. Yes, I ate most of that on my own. There are times when exercise is an exercise in futility, and I think I just hit one of those times.

We have a gym at work, but I’m always intimidated to go there out of fear of looking like a pansy-ass newbie. I don’t use real weights. I use machines. Apparently, only women use machines (and even then, only girly women). I’m afraid if I go there and use the machines, someone will fix me a pomegranate martini and leave the Lifetime network on the television when they leave.

Don’t get me wrong—I still do some minor strength training at home. Yeah, laugh it up. Ok, I don’t actually do a lot of it. But I’m trying to do more, since I’m eating like a baby whale. I’m actually typing this right now in the hopes of sticking to it. I don’t think muscles will change my gangly demeanor, but it’ll make me feel better about the desserts I’ll be finishing off in the next few days.

Oh, did I mention that on Thursday nights, I go out for half price appetizers at Applebees at about 10:30? If any PlattFormers want to drag my ass into the gym, it will be greatly appreciated, pomegranate martinis or no.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, August 26th, 2009 at 9:58 pm and is filed under Life in General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.