Suppose someone wanting to learn to dance said: “For hundreds of years now one generation after another has been learning dance steps, it’s high time I took advantage of this and began straight off with a set of quadrilles.” One would surely laugh at him; but in the world of spirit such an attitude is considered utterly plausible.

– Soren Kierkegaard, Fear and Trembling, Preamble from the Heart

I discovered this truth at age 14, when I took the faith I was raised with and wrestled with it and made it my own. I soon found that I had to repeat this discovery with every truth I had learned in my life. I’d learned the difference between an objective truth and a subjective truth. You can say something is true without actually being able to articulate why that thing is true. You can know something is true without being willing to change your life because of it.

The term “subjective truth” has gotten such a bad rap in the church at large simply because people don’t understand what it means. I think any serious Postmodernist would agree that letting every person decide for themselves what is good and evil represents a rather shallow and egocentric understanding of truth.

What’s more, I think the church could really benefit from teaching people to discover the roots of truths rather than just saying that they’re true. I can’t tell you how many conversations I’ve had with people that fall apart because they don’t know the foundations of what they uphold as true.

I’m not saying that die-hard Modernists don’t understand the things the hold to be true. I’m just saying that the church in general seems to have a bit of a problem with that, and it could be helped by a change in approach.

For those who don’t know, Janelle works part-time as a shoe shiner in a bank. The bank is also the lender for our house loan, so I was there today to sign some papers for the closing. While we were waiting for some papers to be processed, Janelle decided to shine my shoes. Here was the exchange:

me: What’s that?
Janelle: What, the scuff?
me: No, those things that look like little, tiny teeth marks.
Janelle: [thinks about it] They look like little, tiny teeth marks.

That’s right—a cat took a bite at my shoe. My new shoes. They’re made of leather, so it may have been instinctual.

I found a new theme for my next party. It will be a Final Fantasy party. Go on, click the link. I think every Final Fantasy geek wants to throw a party like that in the hopes that people like these will show up:

But every Final Fantasy nerd that can carry on a conversation with normal people knows that these people will show up:

I don’t know, I still want to have that party.

http://www.qwantz.com/apologies/000078.html

From the guy who brought you Dinosaur Comics.

Don’t sniff the wine cork when they show it to you in a fancy restaurant. It’s going to smell like cork. They show it to you so you can see that it’s not rotted, molded over, or made out of arsenic. Sniffing it makes you look like a total noob.

(Thanks, Landon, for today’s tip.)

I just started Fear and Trembling by Kierkegaard. Here’s an excerpt from the first paragraph of the second chapter:

An old proverb fetched from the outward aspect of the visible world says: “Only the man that works gets the bread.” Strangely enough this proverb does not aptly apply in that world to which it expressly belongs. For the outward world is subjected to the law of imperfection, and again and again the experience is repeated that he too who does not work gets the bread, and that he who sleeps gets it more abundantly than the man who works. In the outward world everything is made payable to the bearer, this world is in bondage to the law of indifference, and to him who has the ring, the spirit of the ring is obedient, whether he be Noureddin or Aladdin, and he who has the world’s treasure, has it, however he got it. It is different in the world of spirit. Here an eternal divine order prevails, here it does not rain both upon the just and upon the unjust, here the sun does not shine both upon the good and upon the evil, here it holds good that only he who works gets the bread, only he who was in anguish finds repose, only he who descends into the underworld rescues the beloved, only he who draws the knife gets Isaac.

I think I’m going to like this book. If you’re interested but don’t want to shell out the money for your own copy, the entire text is online here.

I think this passage illuminates something C.S. Lewis touched on. Almost every human has a conception of justice and what is fair. This is usually a very strong notion. But when you look at the world around us, it’s hardly fair. The natural law is that the strong take, and the weak are taken or taken from. Goodness is not rewarded unless it translates into strength. I think most people would agree that this isn’t really “fair.”

Where we get this concept of fairness from is a mystery, since it rarely actually exists in nature. Lewis says that this conception is inborn in humanity and present because of our formation in God’s image. Many of the philosophers (excluding most of the Postmodern persuasion) would say that this is simply human transcendence—rising above nature.

Anyway, I have my thoughts (I’m in the Lewis camp). I want to hear yours. Why do we have a conception of justice that is thoroughly unrealistic (meaning seldom found in our perceivable reality)?

Tonight, I played “What if God was One of Us,” “I Hope You Dance,” “I Dare You to Move,” and “How Great Thou Art.” With the same group. For the same audience. At church.

Manos, the Hands of Fate – I originally saw this as a Mystery Science Theater 3000 feature, and it was well-deserved. For those who don’t know, MST3k is a show where a guy and a few robots watch an inexorably horrible movie and make fun of it as they watch. Manos was so bad that they couldn’t even properly make fun of it. It’s like they didn’t even have a script—just a vague idea of the movie they wanted to make. The movie climaxes not when the mysterious villain finally reveals himself, but when a group of women in white robes wrestle around on the ground in a manner that manages to elude sexiness altogether. Also, I think the soundtrack contains one song, which is repeated throughout the entire movie.

Battlefield Earth – This movie was rumored to be the big Scientology blockbuster of the summer. I was disappointed to find out that it was actually a sad cross between Star Trek and Conan: The Barbarian. It’s a movie about captivity and the perseverance of the human spirit. It’s a movie about barbarians learning to fly a Harrier jump jet in a month. One month. It’s a movie about cheap jokes about long tongues. It’s a movie in which they blow up the aliens’ homeworld, in a scene that lingers on in absolute silence for a little longer than anyone was comfortable with. I actually stood up and applauded at that point, begging the movie to be over so my friends would let me leave. I was wrong. When Scientologists produce a movie like Saved, I’ll go see it.

My Big Fat Greek Wedding – There. I said it. I think I may be the only person on Earth who would add this movie to this list, but I’m standing by it. The plot was trite and predictable, the character development was fragmented (at best), and the pacing was terrible. This movie was staked entirely on people being able to relate to the protagonist’s dealings with her family, but I found myself more emotionally attached to the delicious Greek dishes at the reception. Mmmmmm. Dolmades.

Legally Blonde – Legally Blonde is one of the few movies that made me ashamed to be a human being. Structurally, the movie resembled a superhero movie about a girl whose power was being really blonde. There were scenes of self-discovery where she learned to use her blonde super powers to help others in court. There were scenes of her struggling to fit in at school because of her abilities, but later scenes of her helping or befriending those who shunned her. Replace blonde with a real superpower and you have X-Men. I think a little part of me died when I found out they were making a sequel, although I have to admit I’ve never seen it.

The Hulk – I’m referring to the 2003 version with Eric Bana. The movie opened with a re-cap of Bruce Banner’s childhood at a pace Speed Racer can only dream about. I’ve actually gotten motion sickness from watching a few movies, but this movie gave me time sickness. After a while, the movie flashed ahead to Bruce Banner as a struggling scientist, which is when I came to the sad realization that they weren’t just flying through the events of his childhood—they were flying through the entire movie. It’s like the movie was edited by a six-year-old boy and his golden retriever. The movie would have been okay had they wrapped up after one plotline, but because they got through it so fast, they threw another one in at the end. ADD, you have met your match.

And that last one brings me to a second topic. Marvel comics (the people who invented Spider Man, the X-Men, and the Hulk) finally started their own production company and attained full creative control of the movies they now put out. The quality of the recent Iron Man can largely be attributed to this. Marvel apparently thought the last Hulk movie was so bad that they’re making another one that completely ignores the previous one. It’s not a re-make, it’s not really a sequel—it’s just another movie.

But that brings me to the sad part. I fully expect that this Hulk movie is going to be one hundred times better than the last. (On top of the new creative direction, it also stars Edward Norton as Bruce Banner.) But who’s going to see another Hulk movie a short five years after the godawful last one came out? Marvel’s making great efforts to let people know that they’re ignoring the last one. But that’s kind of like asking me to buy a second Rolex from a guy in a back alley in New York.

That’s not the worst of it, though. Hulk will be starring in the upcoming Avengers movie alongside several other big-names, like Iron Man and Captain America. Is he going to wreck that one too? Hulk just might be the new pariah dog of the movie industry.

Zoey and I are looking for some new websites to read.

What would you, my readers (both of you) suggest?

I hadn’t checked Curtis’s e-mail at DogsOnSkateboards.com for a while, so I checked in. I had some more offers from our friends at Venture Direct Worldwide. Let’s take a look…

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Here’s Curtis’s reply:

Hello! Robyn!

I am very pleased to hear about your offer for Bosley Hair Restoration! I am in the business of teaching people about skateboarding dogs! Could this Bosley Hair Restoration restore hair for dogs that have been injured in skateboarding accidents? If so, I feel I could produce up to 30 leads a month for this offer!

Kindly looking forward to wait for reply, and thank you for your offer of the $30!

- Curtis Hornbuckle
Dogs on Skateboards!

I got a few other offers in the e-mail. There might be more fun to have yet.